Tony Hawk’s Pro Skater 1+2 were recently remastered for next gen consoles, reinvigorating the gaming community’s love for the iconic skateboarding titles. The older generation is reliving their childhood while the newer generation is forming their’s. The success of the series’ remastered edition could spark interest in making more Tony Hawk games in the future, and I have some ideas as to where the games should take place. Here is my list of map choices which would take the Tony Hawk series to the next level.
5. LACMA (Los Angeles, California)
Some people’s idea of visiting Los Angeles is taking a candid-yet-planned picture under the LACMA lights and calling it a vacation. Well, what if you had the opportunity to skate over these folks and the modern art installations that people get away with making millions of dollars off of? The option to glide through different rooms of paintings, sculptures, and other unworthwhile installations whilst getting chased by the “no touching” security sounds like a blast. Skating over contemporary art speaks to the rebellious spirit of skateboarding and would be a welcomed inclusion to the Tony Hawk series. Just make sure you don’t flip trick into the tar pits.
4. Black Pearl Skate Park (Cayman Islands)
With over 62,000 sq. ft. of dedicated skating room, the Black Pearl is one of the largest outdoor skateparks in the world. It is a legendary offshore location where many top of the top skaters have skated over concrete bowls and metal rails. They’ve even got a wave pool! The Cayman Islands provide it all: great views, fun for people of all ages, and tax loopholes for billionaires. The Black Pearl is an impressively large skatepark, but it is merely the second largest. You will hear the park commonly referred to as “the largest skatepark in the Western Hemisphere,” which isn’t bad, I guess. But what about the other hemispheres I hear so much about?
3. Guangzhou Skatepark (Guangzhou, China)
The Guangzhou Skatepark is officially the largest skatepark in the world as officiated by the, I dunno, Skatepark Intelligence Agency? All the other skateparks in the world are dwarfed in comparison to the 182,000 sq. ft. construction site in Guangzhou with ten universities surrounding its perimeter. You could say that they really “ramped” things up (don’t hate me). The park also has select locations for BMX riding and a climbing wall. The Guangzhou Skatepark is practically the Avenger’s Base of skateboarding and it only makes sense that it would be included in the Tony Hawk games.
2. The Hanging Gardens of Babylon (Ancient City of Babylon)
The Neo-Babylonian King Nebuchadnezzar II constructed the fabled Hanging Gardens to remind the homesick Queen Amytis of the green hills of her homeland of Ancient Media. The ascending tiers of gardens resembled a hulking green mountain. Historians are unclear as to whether the Hanging Gardens actually existed or if they were a poetic exaggeration. Maybe in the future, people will say the same thing about Tony Hawk himself.
The remarkable set of stairs created to resemble the slope of a valley is practically asking to get ollied over. Since Babylonian documentation is lacking, perhaps Nebuchadnezzar saw this as the true intention of the Hanging Gardens. Not only should this historical marvel be a map in the Tony Hawk series, but King Nebuchadnezzar II should be an unlockable character.
1. Tony Hawk (Tony Hawk)
Shrinking to microscopic size in order to venture inside another person’s body is an overdone sci-fi trope, but never has it been done for the purpose of skateboarding. What better person to use than the man himself? Imagine sliding through Tony Hawk’s internal organs, using part of his windpipe as a halfpipe, and doing a heel flip inside of his heel. I imagine an Osmosis Jones-esque skating metropolis inside of the greatest skateboarder that ever lived.
The point I’m trying to make with my list is that there should be boundless limits to where you can take your virtual skateboard. Anywhere in the world at any point in time, you should have the freedom to pop shove-it wherever you may roam. As long as Superman by Goldfinger is playing in the background, anything is possible.